the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Randomize