I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
NoShamevember. You game?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Randomize