we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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