I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
