I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
