Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
People in love make me want to vomit
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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