I would go down on you faster than GM stock
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I believe in your delicious
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
