She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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