i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Randomize
