That's intense
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
