I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
