I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
