I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize