WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
