I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
