yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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