Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
