yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
