I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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