it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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