Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
