i permit you to call me
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
