dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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