Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
