Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
