Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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