i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Randomize