New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
