If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
so let's talk penis.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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