Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
