it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
