Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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