Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
