it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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