THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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