He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
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