I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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