So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
