Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
