I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I would ride that face into the sunset
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize
