i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Randomize
