Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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