you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
