Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Randomize
