So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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