Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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