i'm lost and i look like a hooker
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
