i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
