I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
