Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
