I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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