i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Randomize
